I want to be heard
22.female.bisexual. writer.reader.photo ninja.

Pennsylvania for now. Lancaster lady

Talk to me. I don't bite. (most of the time at least)

I put my heart on my sleeve through the words that I write on here. So read my soul and enjoy.

  • I’m having a sleepless night and a cough driving me insane. It’d be nice to hear from you while I am trapped this way

  • Anonymous Question


    you asked what I have learned from the relationships I’ve had in the past two years. And this is a list for your answer.

    1. If I actually fall for the person I’m with, they always dump me.
    2. I’m looking for someone that is complementary to my personality and vice versa.
    3. I crave a female’s affection even in a relationship.
    4. I want to further my sexual explorations. There is so much left to try.
    5. It isn’t so bad being alone. I just don’t want to end up alone.
    6. rebounds are a horrible idea (though I’m in one right now, sort of)…
    7. Having a crush on a friend is difficult to hide
    8. I’m terrified of being left.
    9. Long distance doesn’t work unless one of you are actually planning on moving closer.
    10. Everyone is a liar
    11. I’m horrible at recovering from break ups because I’ve only ever been broken up with twice. (now)
    12. I don’t like routine. I can’t do it. It just doesn’t sit well.
    13. I keep getting caught in relationships that become routine.
    14. I need to move.

    For almost 2am here, that is what I was able to figure out that I have learned from my relationships in the past two years. If you meant friend relationships as well, let me know. I’ll make sure to make a new list for that then too. :)

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  • "HAVE YOU EVER" hour. DO IT.

    • Okay people, this is your chance.
    • 1. had sex?
    • 2. bought condoms?
    • 3. gotten pregnant?
    • 4. failed a class?
    • 5. kissed a boy?
    • 6. kissed a girl?
    • 7. had a job?
    • 8. left the house without my wallet?
    • 9. bullied someone on the internet?
    • 10. sexted?
    • 11. had sex in public?
    • 12. smoked weed?
    • 13. smoked cigarettes?
    • 14. smoked a cigar?
    • 15. drank alcohol?
    • 16. been to a wedding?
    • 17. been on the computer for 5 hours straight?
    • 18. watched tv for 5 hours straight?
    • 19. been late for school?
    • 20. kissed in the rain?
    • 21. showered with someone else?
    • 22. been outside my home country?
    • 23. been on a road trip longer than 5 hours?
    • 24. had lice?
    • 25. gotten my heart broken?
    • 26. had a credit card?
    • 27. been to a professional sports game?
    • 28. broken a bone?
    • 29. been unhappy about my weight?
    • 30. won a trophy?
    • 31. cut myself?
    • 32. been on a diet?
    • 33. rode in a taxi?
    • 34. stayed up for 24 hours or more?
    • 35. been to a concert?
    • 36. had a crush on someone of the same sex?
    • 37. had braces?
    • 38. wore make up?
    • 39. lost my virginity before I was 16?
    • 40. kissed someone a different race than myself?
    • 41. Snuck out of the house?
    • 42. had oral sex?
    • 43. dyed my hair?
    • 44. met someone famous?
    • 45. been on vacation?
    • 46. been on a boat?
    • 47. been on an airplane?
    • 48. prank called someone?
    • 49. taken a pregnancy test?
    • 50. been suspended from school?
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  • Anonymous asked : Dear ex boyfriend.

    Dear ex boyfriend,

    It is hard not to think about you. I still expect to see you come walking into work for no reason, but to say hello to me and tell me you are giving me a ride home. I still expect a random text in the morning just to make sure I heard from you first thing. Songs like Cruise by Florida Georgia Line just makes me remember car rides with you when you would sing that song to me (every time it would play on the radio). Country music in general makes me torn between smiling and heartache because you and my roommate are the reason I even listen to it now.

    I miss the way you showed affection in such a subtle way in public and such a meaningful way when it was actually you and me. I want to be able to curl up with you and Boost again on the couch while you play a videogame or we watch TV. I want to ride in your car to hang out with your friends or to go to Roots.

    You walked away from me, and honestly, I don’t fully understand why to this day. Everything was going fine I thought, but you said you couldn’t handle a girlfriend anymore. Friends say it is just because you wanted to be able to fool around with other girls, and I didn’t want to believe that. Hard not to now that I know you trie to sleep with one of your close friend’s girlfriends. I mean really…

    I hope your job is going really well for you though, and I saw the new truck on facebook so I’m glad you were finally able to get a new vehicle even though I’ll miss your volvo if you don’t still have it. Are you still trying to get that motorcycle?

    I hope Boost is doing well. He is such a sweetheart puppy. I miss walking into your house and him greeting me with so much excitement. Playing tug-o-war with him was always fun as well as trying to squeeze between you and him so that we could actually cuddle, even though he always found a way to be the one getting cuddled in the end.

    How’s your dad? I know the last time I really said anything about him I was really mad about him making it so you couldn’t go to that country concert. I wanted you to be there with me so bad that I didn’t think about what I was saying. I know he isn’t the greatest, but he is still your dad. Are you still living with him or finally looking for a place of your own?

    I miss you. A lot.

    (and I think I love you)

  • Anonymous asked : Do you have any friends that you feel like you're losing because of changing interests, distance, lack of care, etc. (from you're perspective or theirs)?

    I feel like I have lost touch with a few that I really don’t want to lose. I don’t feel that I have lost them yet, but it all depends on how things turn out at this point.

    I am starting to make the effort (though being very bad at it) at getting back in touch with them and hanging out and everything.

    It is a work in progress…that needs a lot of work from my end to successfully get this all going again.

  • Anonymous asked : To your anon request: I don't really know a terrible lot about you besides your wonderful personality and a few life things. I'm awful at communication, but I think of you often and I think of you fondly. I think you're really attractive, and I'm not quite sure how to tell you because you live so far away and it wouldn't matter anyways. Good night :)

    Thank you anon. ^_^ this is incredibly sweet and made me really smile. Just tell me. No need to worry how with our distance.  Just tell me. I won’t bite, I promise.

  • My Perfect Mate

    Someone who can make me laugh.
    Someone who understands that I don’t always want to be talking
              and actually enjoy just listening every once in a while.
    Someone who doesn’t always agree with me
              but knows how to have a civil argument as well.
    Someone that can get philosophical with me.
    Someone that will sit and enjoy a cup of tea with me while talking about world problems
              or curled up on the couch watching some random movie neither of us have heard of.
    Someone who can actually enjoy doing nothing sometimes.
    Someone that can get along with most animals.
    Someone not afraid to try something new.
    Someone that love to make spontaneous plans
              but also actually likes knowing what they are doing most times.
    Someone that sees more than just what is put in front of them.
    Someone who is comfortable with who they are.
    Someone that likes to be chivalrous.
    Someone who isn’t offended when I want to pay sometimes.
    Someone that accepts the extent of my nerdiness
              but also loves my need to play sports and socialize.
    Someone that will always be wanting to protect me
              and understands why I worry.
    Someone that just has moments of being a complete idiot
             because acting their age was overbearing for that long.
    Someone who doesn’t like doing things the expected way.
    Someone who loves tattoos as much as me.
    Someone who doesn’t understand the need for labels.
    Someone that wants to travel to the ends of the world.
    Someone that wants a family someday
             but not like tomorrow.

    Someone at my pace.
    Someone to compliment me.
    Someone to love. 

    • 5
  • the year to start

    in a month and a half
    so close but so far
    school shall start again
    to start the fourth year
    will be quite a scare
    so much to be expected
    the year to be strong
    and dedicated
    so I’m not stuck here forever
    to stick to my major
    no changing my mind
    because I’ve got to have it right
    at least this time 

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